Friday, December 31, 2010

Doubt

I do not remember if I have ever talked about how much I dislike doubt. When doubt creeps into our heads, we question everything. We second guess things we didn't think twice about before. Sometimes, that doubt comes from a gut feeling about something we are unsure of and teeter-totter back and forth about what we should do. Other times, doubt comes from something external. Something someone said, a gesture that was made, or some other sign that we interpret to be a negative one. Something like that was made earlier this week and it has been bothering me every since. I had done something that I was very comfortable with that made me vulnerable. I was very comfortable with my decision until I interpreted something a friend said so I changed my decision. Soley based on her comment. I trust her completely, so of course, I value her opinion. However, I also feel like I need to be true to myself and my original feelings about my decision. One person told me that I should go back to my original decision, but have DOUBT. Here is the irony of this post...I was visiting with a 14 year old daughter of a co-worker yesterday and I told her to not let outside sources influence our decisions or our feelings. I became a hypocrite at that moment and didn't like that either. What to do...what to do...Too many times we question when we should just go and do what our heart tells us to, but we take time to stop and think. Go with your gut - that is usually the best anyway, or so the story goes.

Tuesday, December 28, 2010

Can one person change the world?

This thought came to me on my vacation as I was running along the beach in Cancun. As I was focused on my run, I noticed a guest of the resort taking his time to pick up trash that had either been left on the beach or washed ashore. His actions stopped me in my tracks as I processed what I was seeing. His selfless act of taking his time to do something that perhaps others might not ever notice that would make the world better. Do you believe that YOU have the power to make such an impact on others? I believe we all do. Look at Oprah - 25 years ago, she was just another talk show host like Phil Donahue (before Dr. Phil) and Sally Jesse Rafael. Now, people cannot say her name without thinking of what she will do next. What project is she involved in, what book will she recommend, what celebrity will come and stand on her couch, etc. She was not satisfied with the status quo or said, "It is what it is" and has changed the world we live in. We are can inspire each other to be more, to do more, to give more, to love more. We should not settle for anything in life. If we want something different, then we have to be willing to work for that change. More homework - how can you change your life to impact the world? Now, the world does not have to mean the whole world - it always starts smaller. No one ever changed the whole world in one day. In fact, it is still a work in progress. Believe in yourself, follow your heart, and keep yearning for better and accept different. Nothing experienced is ever as you expect it anyway. Most times, in reality it is better. Enjoy the life you have been given and welcome it with open arms and treasure every day. Smile more, feel more and show it. You are one person and you have a purpose. Never, never, never, never give up. Every day, strive to make today better than yesterday, because before we know it, tomorrow will be here. Together, we can change the world.

Sunday, December 26, 2010

Refreshed and feel groovy!

I hope this finds everyone safe, warm, and with loved ones during this wonderful holiday season. Our family just returned from a (much needed) vacation and enjoyed our Christmas Day as well with my mom. Next weekend, we will be off to the in-laws for a visit. This vacation was the first one in a very long time where relaxing on the beach for 8 hours was what we intended to do and therefore, the perfect day. Our boys would stop by and check in, get something to eat and head back to the pool. I highly recommend a visit to the Cancun, Mexico area for everyone. In fact, we are already planning another trip back there within 5 years. I got up and ran 3 times on the beach at sunrise - which was absolutely breathtaking. Every time, I wished Rocky was with me - she would have loved the view and seeing the sun come up on the horizon is one of my favorite memories from this trip. One friend dared me not to run, so I guess I lost on that one. She knew I would not be able to resist. We also included somethings into our vacation that I might had been a little nervous about (ziplining from tower to tower high above the jungle), but I did it and loved every minute of it. I am not sure what my attitude towards those new experiences would have been a year ago, but I sure enjoyed it this past week. I felt alive, with no worries, and loving every minute each new day would bring. Fear was not something that I felt as I climbed down three stories into a fresh water cave to swim. You can see the absolute joy on my face in some of the pictures. I am home now, getting ready to head back to work tomorrow and anxiously awaiting life's new quirks with open arms. I hope that your New Year brings you much joy as you celebrate your life and the story it tells to those around you. When you are not at your best, remember that you are loved, treasured, and mean the world to at least one other person, but usually more than we think. Be refreshed and take time to also laugh and be groovy, too. Life is more fun that way. Happy Holidays.

Friday, December 17, 2010

Not my problem

Now, before you go to another page, hear me out. I came up with this phrase about 2 years ago when my oldest son was a senior in high school. I was trying (I thought) to encourage and guide him on the things he needed to do to submit applications for college, complete scholarships, schedule trips to schools, etc. His attitude always seemed like, "I'll get to it when I get to it." It made me want to seriously hurt him (I didn't). But once I took a step back and I realized that his future was not my problem, my life was so much easier. As parents, our job was just about over and ultimately, his future should mean more to him than it does to us. That is when I came up with this phrase - "Not my problem." It was so liberating. I had let go of all of the anxiousness that I had been carrying, but it wasn't mine to carry. Anyway, I have shared that with everyone who had asked how the senior year went. Here's how small the world is...in the spring of 2009, I had told a fellow baseball mom about "Not my problem." I don't see her very much, but she is always fun to talk to. when I do see her. Then, almost a year ago, I meet Rocky, and eventually her mom. I mention to her mom about that I know Rocky's sister (the baseball mom), but never knew they were sisters. Seriously? They really don't look alike at all. Anyway, her mom starts telling me that baseball mom says, "Not my problem" all the time and she has always wondered where she got it from. I tell her from me. Now, you may be asking yourself, what is the point of this post? If you haven't picked up on it yet, I work with kids and sometimes get an opportunity to visit with them about stuff going on in their lives. A few months ago, a young man and I had such a visit. He is in the middle of a horrible custody battle between his parents, which has affected him on most levels. Anyway, I had made a point to tell him that his parents's problems were not his problems, so he needed to focus on taking care of himself. Here is where it gets interesting...yesterday, when he was in court, he told the Judge that! He said, "Their problems are their problems. It is not my problem." Now, only he and I know that we had that conversation, but I could not stop thinking about it, so I wrote about it. There are signs everywhere, guiding us where we need to go and do. I think this is telling me I might be on the right track. Have a wonderful weekend. I am not sure that I will get to post before the holiday, but wishing you all a very Merry Christmas. If this is what 2010 has been like, I wonder what 2011 will be about!

Monday, December 13, 2010

Asking for HELP just about killed me!

I have been an independent person since about 9th grade, when because of circumstances I decided to take care of everything myself. I have mentioned previously that I do not like to rely on other people because I viewed it as a sign of weakness. I even have my husband trained so well that he does not offer to help anymore - I have to ask for it. Last week, I was looking up something from the internet and saw a side article titled, "Top 5 reasons women don't like to ask for help." Needless to say, I read the article which went on to say that we do not like to feel that we are inadequate or helpless since we are used to taking care of it all. I call it the Wonder Woman syndrome - she needs a plane to fly (her one weakness) compared to Super Girl. We also do not like feeling like we are out of control or feel like we are imposing. Here is where it really hit me - I asked a longtime neighbor to see if she would mind picking up our mail and paper while we are out of town next week on a family vacation. I didn't think twice about it - we have done it for each other for years. I have another friend who offered to run to the store and have perishables in my fridge for Christmas day dinner when we got home. She has been offering since the summer and I have shrugged her off and tried to make it work without her help. Why was it so easy for me to ask one friend to help me and so difficult to ask another? I think it is because this friend and I have not done those types of things for each other in the past, so it is new and unfamiliar. I was even glad when our flight on the 24th lands just after 8pm, thinking I would still have time to run to the store to get my last minute items. No such luck - all the stores close early that night. That leaves me with one option - allow my friend to help me. She and I chatted about it last week at lunch and I told her that I don't feel like I reciprocate as much as I should. Not that we would keep track of anything because I don't believe in that either. Would I do the same for her? Without question. She tells me that I reciprocate more than I know (apparently I really don't know, because I cannot think of anything I have done to help her). I was paying attention to the signs that were coming my way - make sure you do as well. Anyway, with a heavy sigh, a list with some cash, I am giving in and letting go. I am asking her for help. I don't like it (would rather rapel off a building), but will do it. Have to have milk and rolls Christmas Day. Enjoy your week.

Friday, December 10, 2010

Don't give your power away

On Wednesday of this week, the day started awesome. Rocky came over for a run (with scarf and two sets of gloves) and we had an awesome time. It was great to see her and catch up. I get to work a little later and am feeling good, feeling fabulous, doing my thing. Then, I get a phone call from a woman who can put someone slightly on the edge. I know I am telling her things she does not want to hear, and before I can say anything else, she hangs up on me! If anyone had been in my office, you literally would have seen my jaw hit the floor. This woman is asking for my help and when I told her we were doing the best we could, she didn't even say "thank you" or "goodbye". I immediately called a co-worker (she had the priviledge of working with her last year), as I knew she would understand. The co-worker is laughing and tells me, "Don't give your power away." It was appropriate and very simple. My day had started great and because of one little insignificant episode, my great day took a little halt. But once I changed my attitude and did not give my power away, my fabulous day continued. Ask yourself, do I give my power away? I believe there are only two things we can ever control in our lives - attitude and effort. Attitude always come first and you never have a bad attitude and put forth good effort. Usually, they go hand in hand and unfortunately, are the same. So, your message for today is that if you are on cloud 9 and some little hiccup comes along to keep you in check, keep your power. Sometimes, it is all we have. Have a FANTABULOUS weekend!!!

Sunday, December 5, 2010

What are you waiting for?

In the last few days, I have been reminded of how fragile life is and why we can never take it for granted. A family member had a stroke and I am unsure of her prognosis and two other people I know have been diagnosed with cancer. That got me thinking...I know, people sometimes get nervous when that happens. I have already asked you to figure out your dream. I also want you to start identifying who is your support team or "dream team". Then I want you to ask yourself, "What am I waiting for?" What happens if all of the things you are waiting for are waiting for YOU to do something first? I have decided I am tired of waiting and of being afraid of not doing something to make my life better everyday. I don't even know how I would answer this question. If I had to answer it, I would probably say, "I am waiting for everything to be ok." Everyone would wait for the guarantee - then there is no risk involved. Guess what? No one can tell me that. No one can tell anyone that. I have to take these chances with writing on my blog, with reaching out to others, with pursuing my dream and following my passion. I want you to know that I am in "GO MODE." My family knows exactly what that means. Now, that may be partly because of the time of year, but I am done with waiting. I have waited what seems like a lifetime to get me where I am now, and it has only been 12 months. I am no longer just going to let life happen around me, but I am resolved to make sure that I am being an active participant in my life. It amazes me how much fear stops us from doing anything that is new, different, or out of the ordinary. Ok...here is your challenge this week:
1. Write our your passion
2. How can your passion fullfill your dream
3. Who will help you?
4. What are you waiting for?

It is amazing how when you write things down (even if you never share them) you see the words and it is as if someone is reminding you of where you want to be. Be honest and truthful...you can always email me at michelle.itstartstoday@gmail.com if you want to visit more. I would love to hear from you! Make it happen!

Friday, December 3, 2010

OMG - Going to be so hard!

Ok, so Friday's have been traditionally the day I take off from running and this week I have been forced to be on the elliptical because it has been like 15 degrees at 5am. Rocky is pretty much done running with me for the winter, but will also take it on a day by day basis. Today, I did not get on the elliptical and it was a crazy, busy day at work. Nothing bad or extraordinary happened, just a busy time in our office. I came home and told my husband, I am going for a run. And you know what??? I LOVED IT!!! I don't think I can go til March without running! NO WAY! I think I may have to still squeeze in a run or two a couple of times a week when I can. Even if it as 2pm in the afternoon on the weekends. There will be no way that I go so long without running. Here is the OMG part - I never thought I would miss running and it has only been a week. A few days ago, I subscribed to a couple of online running magazines. I am totally hooked on this running thing. This is the lesson I learned tonight - I will have to adapt to make this thing still work. I was in a mode of doing my running at 5am every morning and had conditioned myself to stick with that routine. I felt so much better after my run. I did not even feel like I was dreading it or working hard. Just doing my thing and loving every minute of it. I sit here and shake my head, almost in disbelief thinking that it all started with Rock asking me what I would change about my life. Do what makes you happy and brings you joy. Even if you have to adapt...even if it is different...even if it is not the norm. Handle adversity with strength and belief that you will be better for it. Let's just say even with winter just getting here, I cannot wait until warmer weather gets here only so I can run!!!

Every day, I am doing something

My mojo has been off this week and the only explanation I can come up with is that I have not been able to run. The Nebraska winter might make me more crazy than I already am if I am not able to run outside. I have been on the elliptical every day, but it is not the same. Call me crazy - oh, wait, I already did that. :-) Here is the thing, every day I am doing something that takes me closer to pursuing my dream. I have identified what makes my heart soar (my passion) and am using that to guide me towards my dream (putting my passion into action). I worked on some of it this week and will continue to do so until I am ready to strategize and accomplish certain tasks so that my dream can be fullfilled. I even saw an advertisement for something that I had not thought of, but peaked my interest because it was something that I have thought about but did not know I could do it. Totally cool. Today, I am going to lunch with a co-worker who asked me about the "new" Michelle. I told her it may take longer than our alloted hour so we may have to do lunch again. I asked you a couple of weeks ago to look at your dreams and urged you to get closer to them. What have you done for them lately? I recently found out that two people I know have cancer and it is not looking very good for either one of them. I was very humbled by their situations because just prior to that I was trying to figure out what I can wear on our trip to Mexico in two weeks (since I have lost weight since this summer - good thing). Life is too short and no one has any guarantees. When you have nothing to lose and everything to gain, take a chance. If you you won't give yourself a chance, why would anyone else? Don't look to others for a reason to do something or not to do something. You get so much more when you "Follow Your Heart" - I know I am committed to living my life that way, every day. Remember, It Starts Today.