Things unravel

This time of year, we can feel so overwhelmed. For some of us, it doesn't matter what time of year it is...life itself has us going on all cylinders and we feel like if we stop, then we will not have the strength to get back up again. Like a string on a sweater that seems to just barely noticeable, something gets pulled on and then the next thing you know, everything is falling apart. Looking back, you can't even remember what started everything in motion. I ran into a friend this week at work and she told me in a matter of hours, her son had lost his wallet, locked the keys in the car, and the battery died (as his friend waited once inside the car when her son was looking for his wallet). I know what that feels like when everything seems to be hitting you all at once. I have to replace three major appliances this holiday season (yeah for me?!?), but you have to have them. Because the alternative is more of an inconvenience than NOT having them. How do you react when things start to spiral out of control? Do you shut others out? Do you vent to those that will listen? Do you ask for help? I told our son this week that his attitude about a situation that would not change would have to be what changed. He did not like it, but he knew it. There are times like this in everyone's life...I mean, they say things happen in three's. So I guess, if one thing happens, pay attention, because usually there is a couple more headed your way. If you had the three already come to you, then maybe they are done for a while. Pick up the pieces of that sweater and put it back together as best as you can. Know it may not be exactly they way it was, but it is better than not having it at all.

The Hard Way

I'm not sure why I thought about this subject this morning. Maybe it is because I am back on the dreaded elliptical as the weather turns colder. Rocky doesn't come anymore (I understand why), so getting up and staying motivated is different now. I remembering telling my husband that I get up to run/walk/elliptical not for her, but for me, but it is easier to get up when you know someone is going to be at your door at 5am. But I also started thinking about the life I've lead and to some it may seem that I've lived it the hard way. Not intentionally or by choice, but I guess by design. By someone else's design. When I was growing up, I didn't know any different life, but knew there were certain things I did want or didn't want. There are things and people I have fought for and would committ to for life. Choices were made that might have made me struggle, but through that I learned what I am capable of and what I can accomplish. When you love something and treasure it so much that it pains your very core to be without it, you will do all you can to keep it. We all feel, at some time or another, that life is not perfect...that we think it is unfair...but when we struggle, we learn. We grow...we change our attitude...we accept. As much as we would pick something different for us, maybe that in itself is meant to teach us something. Although this was hard for us and we grieved for life lost, for something unfulfilled, we also know that this was the way we were meant to travel. It was designed for us. People that have everything given to them would never know how to survive outside their little perfect world because you and I know the world isn't perfect. So remind yourself today that if something is in front of you that you are having to confront, know and accept that it is there for a reason. It's going to be hard to make you make notice of it. Somehwere, in the middle of the strife and chaos, there is a lesson. I know I learn lessons all the time...even those I don't want to. Sometimes, the hard way is the only way and after a few scars and mistakes made along the way, you have to realize that this is the designed way.

Best things in life are magical

On Tuesday, the word "magic" was also used in a text when I asked Rock how she scored some Fun Dip, when I couldn't. I thought it was ironic that I had not really ever used the word "magic" recently in every day life. But I never really thought about those special moments before last night when it was mentioned in a play we attended. And since I had no pen and paper, I had to try to remind myself to remember to post about it later. Yes, as soon as I could turn my phone back on, I was sending myself an email to do just that. There are those special moments that are just magical. Where we are overcome with emotion and will always remember who we were with or how we felt. I love to hear laughter that is not superficial, but truly shared and given. There is one guy I know that I could never lose at Disneyland because his laugh would give him away. I love it. I love to hear my sisters' stories about crazy things that happen - and the "heehee" that comes after that totally cracks me up. Ok, kitty...we need to have an app that will allow us to record sounds/voices that we can send in a text. Because just typing the words do not really carry the same meaning or really convey the same meaning. What are the things that happen to you that are magical? Are the simple things we all take for granted on that list? Why not? Are you looking for magic in your life? It really isn't that hard, people. Magic is everywhere...but we have to see it. We don't need to know how it works or what is behind it. We just need to remember how we feel when it happens because the feelings alone jog our memory to those uncomplicated moments that we absolutely treasure. That make us forget about the difficulties and trying times that we know will always be there. Find the magic in your life. One of my hobbies is scrapbooking, but I do not always have time for it, but need to make more time. But those pictures remind me of those magical time when my boys were younger, when Mike and I got married, or other special moments with friends and family. Magic is everywhere. It is where we don't think it is because we might think it needs to be some grand event. It can be a walk around a lake that results in a name for a dream come true. It can be a smile from someone you have not seen in a really long time. Or it can even be a quick text from a son away at college. Don't just look for magic to happen to you. Make it happen in other people's lives, too. You don't need a top hat or a secret mirrored box. You create magic when you do something for someone just because you can. You will then see magic everywhere and know you had a hand in it. I promise.

Not in the driver's seat

Yesterday, I was driving to one of my son's football games and in the car next to me was this cute boxer sitting in the passenger seat. As I smiled repeatedly to myself, as innocent and carefree this act was, it frew into somthing that I needed to post here. Here is this cute dog, letting her tongue fly out of her mouth, with her big brown eyes rapidly trying to take in everything that came into view. She has no idea where she was going, but she was just happy for the ride. This happy, go-lucky little pooch was loving every minute of it. Someone else was driving, and she was just ok with that. That is how we should be...we should be ok with letting someone else drive, and we should be trying to take in as much as we can. The boxer did not know where she was going, just as we do not know our final goal. For a very long time, I thought that I either had no control over the way my life went or needed to have total control. Neither was true. I had to compromise and control what I could, and let go of what I couldn't. I am not driving my life...only God can do that. But I can pick and choose what I see along the route. I think before I had blinders on, so I only saw what was directly in front of me. Never did I turn my head to see other viewpoints and use that information to learn from as I travelled further ahead. I don't want to miss anything anymore. I have missed out on so much. Even when it was in front of me, I tried to dismiss it as being make-believe. Never again. I want to be just like that boxer (Ok, I will not let my tongue or anything else hang out, for that matter) - absorbing what I saw and how I felt. That is what I am doing...riding in the passenger seat...being a boxer. Do you want to be a boxer too? Come on, it's fun!

Some things cannot be taught....they must be learned

I was thinking about an incident that occurred about 5 months ago that I had to learn something that someone could not teach me. I had to learn it in my own way, in my own time, and on my own. Someone forced me to do that and look deep into my heart to really find the answers I was afraid to give. I got a wonderful text last night from one of my most favorite people and he tells me, "Thanks" for teaching him about attitude and effort. He had to see it regardless of how much I showed it to him. He had to WANT to see it regardless of how much I said the same words over and over. He has heard the same message again and again and I think he finally gets it. But I totally understand where he was coming from -- been there. Sometimes the hardest lessons are the ones that mean the most...that hurt the most...that can change us the most. We are never graded on those lessons, but we can define our progress from those lessons. Learning is an ongoing part of life and that is how we grow. We need to challenge ourselves to be better tomorrow. I really hope that this great young man takes his words that he spoke to me to heart and holds fast to those convictions that will motivate him to stay on track with these newly found examples of how he CHOOSES to ensure that his attitude dictates his effort and therefore, everything that comes as a result of that. Life is about discovery and taking our experiences and using them to take another step towards tomorrow. Are you a teacher or a student? We have to be both at times in our life. Use what you know for sure to utilize your skills and talents to make this world better. Learn the lessons that come your way and be willing to teach when you know more than others do. That is how we serve, but rememeber to be humble as well. Those are forever and always the most important lessons we can ever learn.

Remember who you are

Last week in church, our pastor had mentioned this phrase in his sermon, but used it when his teenage children would leave the house, going out to spend time with friends. These four words really stuck with me last week and then I was reading one of my new books and saw it again. "Remember who you are." Do you know who you are? Do we try to be something we are not, sometimes to please others? I think we all do at some time in our lives. However, the real issue is that if we say, "I don't know who I am", we are not being truthful. We all know who we are. We can identify our likes and dislikes, what brings us joy, what makes us sad. Maybe we are asking the wrong question (Who am I?) and need to be asking something more appropriate, like what do I do with me? What purpose do I need to fullfill? This is how we find our passion and start living our dream. So many times, we get stuck in the rut of living our daily lives that we forget about our future, what changes we can make in this world, and how what we say affects others around us. You have to be willing to ask the questions, even if the answers do not come right away. Keep asking the questions. There are people in over 21 different countries that have at one time read this blog and that humbles me beyond belief. I started this blog a year ago at the urging of some friends to allow them to see what I was writing because they wanted to be a part of it and share my journey with me. Never did I think that people all over the world would find what I write of interest, let alone that they would find this little snipit of my life. Our name identifies who we are on paper and so we can be identified when talking with people, but who we are comes from within. Ask yourself today, "Who am I?" and it will be the easiest test you take because you know the answers. Everyday, as you go about your daily tasks or pursue new adventures to satisfy a longing in your heart, remember who you are. If you forget, we will remind you. Have a wonderful weekend!

The need to say something...anything

As I sit in my office watching it lightly snow, I am compelled to write, but don't have a subject right at the tip of my brain at this very moment. Maybe there are too many thoughts up there and it is difficult for me to pick just one. I cannot believe that it cannot be the alternative - that there are no thoughts up there at all. I have tried really hard this week to get back to the Bloomin' me - I even got a note from a friend who reminded me that she likes to see me when I am bloomin. I have expected things from others and have been disappointed; I have thought criticisms of me would never come; I have had to find strength again in the one place it will always be - within myself. I have been resilient at conquering tasks that might others cringe, and even if I was not successful, I felt a great sense of pride knowing that I had never given up. I move forward and carry on - that is what I do. We all need to do that in our lives. Sometimes we just want someone to be there to listen - not to fix it or give advice - just to know that they were there for us can make a huge impact. Try to see other people's points of view, even if they don't see yours; apologize even if you don't think you need to, even if they never do; have faith in others, even when you think you want to give up and throw in the towel. Remember to feel...and share those feelings with those you love. I will never forget what my dad said as our family's statement the day I got married - he said, "Love is not a word, but an action." How do you show those that you love with your actions? I know we sometimes think about ourselves and become selfish at times - who doesn't? Part of my mission statement discusses how I will say what I want to say when I feel it, but if I don't, then I am just censoring myself and am being worse than selfish - I am not being true to me. You can be honest without being hurtful, but you have to try. Remember why you are here...

Vantage Point

This is also a movie title with Dennis Quaid, where there are many different people at this political gathering but because of where they are, they have different vantage points and see different things. Yesterday, I changed my vantage point. I know you are going to think I am crazy (yes, the jury is still out on that one. LOL), but since it was warm yesterday (near 40), I went for a run outside. The sun was out and I wanted to get it done before it went down and it turned colder. I had been thinking that once it got to be warmer (like March), that I would run my normal route backwards. Now, that does not mean running backwards, but running the streets in the opposite direction. That will really throw Rocky off when she gets back to running again. I cannot tell you how new running that old route just in the opposite direction felt. I mean, I have run the same route at 5am in the morning, for 6 days a week, for about 8 months. But this felt different. It felt new and exciting and I was grateful for the time to be able to do it. I don't think it was related to me running during the daytime instead of early morning and I don't think it was related to not running for a month either. On my way, I saw a woman who needed help with her car and I went over to see if I could do anything. Here is where the vantage point comes in - if I had chosen to run my normal route the way I had always run it, I would have run past her and never saw her. This way, she was in my line of sight and watched many cars just drive past her. One woman actually yelled at us to "move the car" because we needed her added input to remind us that we shouldn't leave the car out in the middle of the road. I guess the point of this post is to remind us to look at things from different perspectives. My route was familiar in that I knew which street to turn on, but made the run more enjoyable because of what I was seeing. Remind yourselves today to look at other viewpoints as a way of seeing the bigger picture. We get conditioned to just look at the world a certain way instead of really trying to understand what other people are dealing with in their lives. Be humble and grateful for your blessings. Remember, we cannot have our side without their being another side.