You were born for this

Maybe you are not sure what you are supposed to do with this life you have been given? So, what do you do? You wander. You wait for something or someone to give you some directions, but then reality sets in. You think it will never come. It is different to be searching for something than it is to not be looking. There are a lot of people out there who are not looking. Then, there are those of us that wonder...and are tired of wandering. Then, it comes to you. And does it come. It will hit you like a Mack truck. As you get up, stunned from what just happened, your next step is trying to process it all. After you question it all and cannot even find the words to explain it to others, you are left with one conclusion. You were born for this. This is what you must do. It calls to you in the middle of the night and compels you to do things you never even thought about doing. You tell people exactly what you are feeling, and you go way outside your comfort level that you almost think you are going to throw up. Yes, I went there because we have all wanted to do that, right? Truth of the matter is, you were born for a reason. We have to figure out what that reason is and it is closer than you think. Listen... do you hear it? It screams so loud that its whisper faintly beckons you to pay attention. Are you paying attention? You should.

You ARE a force to be reckoned with!

Do you know how powerful you are? We have all seen the videos of forces of nature - tornadoes, hurricanes, tsunamis, and avalanches. Why are we drawn to watch them? Because they are powerful and NOTHING stands in their way. Yes, these are destructive and we wish they would never happen, but they can teach us something. When does these forces stop? When they have run out of energy and cannot be self-reliant to move further. We are better. We are not destructive, but constructive. We build up rather than tear down. We are self-reliant beyong measure and if we run out of energy, we have someone next to us giving us more to use. I get frustrated when people do not see all that they can do - they settle. Maybe they don't feel like they are settling, but when I hear of unhappiness and dreams never pursued that is what I think. I have been told that when I am "doing my thing" that I have an energy that is contagious and I have seen people absorbing that and taking it all in. Especially those that are reaching for it (whatever "it" is) and not knowing how to get to it. We are powerful and can change the way people think all the time. Sometimes, it is the little things that mean the most - smiling at a stranger; holding the door for someone who might need help; or sending a card to someone you love, just because. Do you feel how mighty you are and what you can do with all of that "oomph"? You have to believe it first. No one can give you that one. When you feel like nothing can stop you and you are so giddy (yes,I said giddy) that you skip as you walk and hum songs in your head and you move. Use that! Yes, exactly that! My new favorite song is, "Move" by Mercy Me. It gets me going every morning since I heard it and then I know the world is in trouble - I AM a force to reckoned with and the world will never be the same. Even tomorrow will be different. Rock your world!

Reflection

Happy Easter to those who celebrate this day. As I watch the sun come up to the east and I see shiny spots of glistening dew on the the blades of the grass in my front yard, I reflect on life. Today, we remember what sacrifices were made on our behalf and that gives us hope. Yesterday, Rocky and I spent another good day together. For a charitable cause, we walked 25 miles in about 6 hours. It was cold and windy at times, and then I remember when the sun came out...we lifted our heads as if we were drawn to the warmth on our faces and took it all in. We were "Team Moxie" and had three other members that went with us, but they were done at the 5-mile and 10-mile marks. But Rocky and I weren't going to quit - especially when we got to mile marker 22 (or so they told us!). We learned more about each other, sang along with our ipods, and saw some pretty interesting things. Even when we were dancing to a song we liked, we didn't even care who saw us...we are at that point in our lives. Pleasing others or doing what is expected is not what guides us now. We are taking care of us first and "those that matter don't mind." They are just along for the ride. We are living our dreams and pursuing them to the fullest, with no safety net below. We understand that we may fall, but we are going to change our lives, either way. Something that is passionately driven cannot be prevented from moving forward. As you reflect on what your life is like now and compare it where you want it to be, what changes are you willing to make to make it different? Have you been stuck in a rut or settling for something less than what you desire because that is easy or you are unsure of where to start? The hardest part is always finding the courage to ask the question...whichever one you want answered. You have to listen and be open to the answer, even if it is not the answer you think it will be. Your heart will tell you everything you will need to know and it will be constant. It will not change. It will create excitement when you talk about it, even when you don't realize it. Someone told me once that she could hear the passion in my voice as I shared an idea with her, and all I could hear were the words. She told me I needed to listen to the passion and moxie that was coming through to her over the phone. Reflection is "fixing your thoughts on something or careful consideration" and as you find peace today, think about where you are and where you want to be. Live your life to the fullest, with no regrets, and be happy. My favorite thing is to see the ones I love be happy and shine while they are doing their "thing". Take the chance to not only change your life, but the lives of those around you. You never know when what you do will change the lives of others. Trust me...I have seen it first hand and it is the greatest gift you can ever give someone. You will never regret that.

I GET IT!!! DON'T YOU?

Oh my gosh!!!! Have you ever just been sitting down, doing whatever, and then felt like something just whopped you upside the head?!? I totally could not stop smiling all day. I send an email to Rocky and just tell her, "I get it!" She replies that she is curious, but I tell her she has to wait...I have to tell her in person. I cannot wait to tell her - I know I can hear the excitement in my voice already and I haven't said a word. Let me back up and really set this up right, so you get the full picture. A couple of weeks ago, I was visiting Rocky in "her office" and she is helping me with some computer stuff so I can take the next step. I begin to tell her how much I doubt (remember - I really, really dislike that word) on what kind of changes I can make in other people's lives and what I am doing there, etc. It all comes out and she says that she believes in me and that I need to move forward. Over the weekend, I send her an email that includes the hesitation of my ability to help others change their lives and that fear is not what seems to be the problem anymore. I actually admit that although I cannot change others lives, I can change mine. Once I admitted that, the doubt disappeared. Ultimately, the choice to change your life is yours alone, although outside influences may lead you to choose that. Even though I have taken chances and new steps that may lead me into a new direction, essentially nothing in my life has changed yet. When we feel inspired, it is mostly as a result of something we saw, read about, or heard. It has been mentioned to me by several people that I can inspire others. But that choice of free will is still their choice. They have to allow that inspiration to get to their soul, before they will make any changes. I realized today that I had the wrong attitude. First and foremost, I must be inspired and motivated to change MY LIFE. Then, and only then, will that change inspire others to do the same. I have heard it over and over at the office since I have lost weight. "What have you done to lose weight?" "Tell me how you did it!" "If you can do it, so can I." I was carrying doubt that wasn't mine to carry. The only doubt that I need to carry is whether or not I have the ability to change my life, and I know I can. I proved it to myself when I took my less than perfect childhood and still believed in wanting more for my husband and children. I proved it by doing it my way, even though it was hard and frustrating. I proved it when I ran my way to be 35 pounds lighter than I was a year ago. I have a sentence in my Life Statement that says, "I have control over how I choose to live my life." We all do, but do we really choose? Or do we just let it happen? You can choose. It was so hard to keep this to myself today...finding little moments to chuckle about how easy a revelation I had just found. Take a deep breath...do you get it yet? You can - it is possible!!

Don't give your power away

On Wednesday of this week, the day started awesome. Rocky came over for a run (with scarf and two sets of gloves) and we had an awesome time. It was great to see her and catch up. I get to work a little later and am feeling good, feeling fabulous, doing my thing. Then, I get a phone call from a woman who can put someone slightly on the edge. I know I am telling her things she does not want to hear, and before I can say anything else, she hangs up on me! If anyone had been in my office, you literally would have seen my jaw hit the floor. This woman is asking for my help and when I told her we were doing the best we could, she didn't even say "thank you" or "goodbye". I immediately called a co-worker (she had the priviledge of working with her last year), as I knew she would understand. The co-worker is laughing and tells me, "Don't give your power away." It was appropriate and very simple. My day had started great and because of one little insignificant episode, my great day took a little halt. But once I changed my attitude and did not give my power away, my fabulous day continued. Ask yourself, do I give my power away? I believe there are only two things we can ever control in our lives - attitude and effort. Attitude always come first and you never have a bad attitude and put forth good effort. Usually, they go hand in hand and unfortunately, are the same. So, your message for today is that if you are on cloud 9 and some little hiccup comes along to keep you in check, keep your power. Sometimes, it is all we have. Have a FANTABULOUS weekend!!!

Unbelievable

Today was like any other day, but things I did not expect happened. One of my co-workers told me today that she reads this everyday. Every day. I started to tell her something, but she already knew because I had added it to my blog. She made my day. I ran into another woman that I usually only work with a couple months a year as I was running an errand on my lunch hour. We visited a little and I again had no issues sharing with her about my weight loss (she noticed) and the life changes I have made as well. I think it surprised her, but also she wanted the blog information and seemed very grateful that I shared it with her. I titled this post as "unbelievable" mostly because everything I write and share with you is personal, vulnerable, and for my benefit as I travel this road of life. Sometimes, I will stop and think that this is not all about me. Since I have "readers" looking for new inspiration and hope, I pray that you feel the courage to try something new and appreciate your journey as well. Although I do not have preconceived goals about what this sharing will do for me, I hope you find comfort and humor in the way that I share my struggles, my excitement, and passion for this new found life. Maybe you find some similarities that you can associate with and realize that we have more in common than we think. I also saw another friend who I have missed (we will need to have lunch soon) and feel so free. This year, I have let go of so many fears and some were pretty deep. Some that I didn't know I had hidden for so long or so deep that when they came to the surface it was something I had never experienced before. Like when you take time to really concentrate and take a deep breath. That release, that sense of relief is so awesome. It is truly unbelievable.