What is given must be accepted

I am sure that I have written on this before, but someone (L) reminded me of this as I was visiting with her yesterday on the phone. She complimented me and I dismissed her, without even thinking about what I was doing. But she reminded me that I need to accept what is given, even if I think it is not warranted. Yeah...that happens a lot. I know she reads this and I will see her next week, so I am hoping she gets a little smile on her face knowing she prompted this post. I am a giver, and receiving has never been one thing I knew how to do very well. Still don't. But I am trying and getting better at it. I can help someone all day long, because they asked for it, but heaven help me if I would ever ask for them to help me. I have refused help even when I knew I didn't have another solution. I have been stubborn and pig-headed (like someone else I know) and was not ready to admit that I could not do it all. I always felt like I was bothering that someone else. Even when Rock first came at 5am - I mean, my losing weight should not be her problem and if I needed help in that department, how rude of me to ask someone (that I did not know well then) to get up at the hour to help me. But I had to let her choose and allowing that was very humbling to me. Still is to this very day. When someone gives us a compliment we are quicker to refuse that than we are a criticism. Why? Because we think we don't deserve it. Last night, I was told by someone who is becoming a great friend that I inspired her to take one step. I do not fully comprehend the effect that I have on others and am trying to be better at accepting those words when they are given. I sometimes think to myself that I am not doing anything different than anyone else would do. I mean, I am just being me and to me that is easy. So, when the kind words come your way, accept them graciously. Not doing so is a refusal of the intent in which they are given. Admit that you might be more than you think you are to those around you. I have to remind myself every day because otherwise, I could not accept what is given to me. Accept what is given and simply say, "thank you."

Happy Mother's Day!

Happy Mother's Day to all moms, grandmothers, great grandmothers, and especially step-mothers. Now, you may wonder why I said especially step-mothers. In retrospect of my life, I understand how difficult that role must have been for someone, who was not a mother by her own right. It would be like getting hired for a job that you have no experience doing, no real knowledge or education, and you move right to the top of the corporate ladder to be co-CEO with the other head of the household. Can you imagine that? I am not sure I could. Maybe you know someone who has had that same experience or still does. I know I do. It may be confusing and unwanted to smaller children who don't quite understand why this woman is now telling me what I can or can't do. I lived that for 9 years with my step-mom and even though we don't stay as connected as we maybe could have been, I am grateful for my sisters who celebrate their first Mother's Day and one who will be a mom for the first time hopefully this week. Because CLRL knows how important I have always been to my sisters and how important I am to them, she gives more now than perhaps she did then. Mom's give their hearts, even when they know they can be broken, and probably expect them to be. They do more than what is expected because they can and they want others to be happy. I ran into someone I once was good friends with today and realized that this was her first Mother's Day without her mom who had passed away. She was very close to her mom and I know that she misses her dearly. I received a couple of texts from family and dear friends wishing me a "Happy Mother's Day" and wanted to do the same for you. Step-moms are the unsung heroes that people forget about, but they probably try harder at being a mom to someone else's kids. They do it because they love the kids' father. Thank those that have influenced you to be who you are today. Chances are you would not be who you are without your mom, regardless of the time spent with her, whether or not you are related by blood, or just believe that she treated you like a mom should. Thanks, Moms, for all you do to make us better.