Changing lives begins with mine

Who would've thought that my life would turn out the way it is right now? My belief was always that I would take what was there, never really understanding that I could change it. I had to accept whatever was given to me and it was the way it was meant to be. I had a nice lunch yesterday with LL (I remember her name -- LOL) as we talked more about how our childhood and past really dictate some of our biggest fears that we carry later on in life. The funny thing is that you don't have to come from a broken home with no money to have the same fears of unworthiness and self-doubt. We all question where we belong, what scares us, and what we believe about ourselves inspite of our environment. That tells me something that is universal - we all have fear and question if what we do matters and makes a difference. I think now we are at an age when we will see it in our kids and want to try to help them get passed where we still are in our own lives. We want them to learn the lesson about hope and courage and passion earlier than we did (or are doing) in our 30's and 40's. We need to take on the committment and willingness to help those around us by guiding them into changing their lives and we can do that in the most simplest of ways...we change our own life. We cannot control what other people think or feel in thier lives, but we can impact them in greater ways than we ever imagined. I have changed my life (for good) over the last 18+ months and have noticed how that has impacted my relationships with other people, what dreams and goals I have for myself, and realized what I am capable of doing. But it started with me. When I started this blog, it was for me. I started looking at life in a way I never had before and it made me feel better about who I am and what drives me. Then I started saying, "Yes" to more things in 2010 than I probably ever had before. I began to let people see more of me and let the walls down. I started a very intense exercise program because I had to do it for me, not for Rocky. I still do it for me, but love it when she is with me. My heart started to tell me things that I had ignored and dismissed for years and I finally started to listen. I realized that I did not need to have everything planned out and that some times "Going with the flow" was ok, too. I was paying attention to what I thought was missing in these teenagers' lives that would be easy for me to incorporate, but could not at work. Then, the bigger cry was heard - the women who are just like me. Women who are trying to find their way, after feeling lost and alone for so long. I am taking on a new project that will be gratifying to those it touches and hopefully they will begin to change their lives. They will see the hope and dreams they have long forgotten. The biggest joy I have ever seen is seeing someone I love live their dream. Who wouldn't want to be a part of that? Change your life and you could very well change the lives of others as well. It Starts with you.

Snowballing in July!!!

Ok...trying to sit and catch my breath. Just for a moment. I am winding down after a crazy, whirlwind over the last 48 hours or so. So much has happened but in such a GREAT way. I have had two really good lunches with two ladies who are at the proverbial doorway or threshold and they are trying to decide if they have the COURAGE to change their lives. I know it is scary and you are unsure. Who isn't? But what do you have to lose? If you are unhappy now, why wouldn't you want to change that? Try something different...do something that you always dreamed of doing, even if other people might not understand. I am blogging my heart away most days of the week and working on other projects that are being carried by momentum that I almost cannot describe. One of my main focuses since August has been teenagers, and although that is still a big part of what I want to do, something related to serving women has taken on an exciting life that started as a crazy idea at the end of May. Here is what I think: we all have the same questions...we all have the same fears...we all have dreams. We are not so different even though we never meet, live thousands of miles away from each other, or speak different languages. We are more similar than we even realize. But instead, we think we are alone. We think no one else can feel or think the same things that we feel or think. The more I visit with women and open up the possibility of something that invigorates their soul, the easier it becomes. Not for me, for them. I told someone this week that I cannot go back and standing still is not an option either. Therefore, I am left with one choice and one choice only - to move forward. This new, exciting venture has me thinking about all that can be done and how can I play a part in it. I am not sure of my role yet, but I know I am getting very close to seeing something come to fruition that I never ever thought of before. I dismissed it...I had set it up to fail even before I even explored it. I was unfair to the opportunities that are before me at this very moment. I have to be open to it all, not just what I think it should be. I ask a lot of questions in these posts and they are meant to get you to think...yes, the hard questions that no one ever asks and are afraid to answer. What would happen if you had the courage to answer that question honestly? Would you commit to what is needed to be done in order to get what you want? When Rocky asked me the "infamous" question, I am not sure why she did. Maybe she doesn't know either. But I answered honestly, thinking I wasn't accountable to her, so what difference did my answer make? It made a lot of difference. She helped me and guided me when I needed it and then at some point, I had to take responsibility for myself. She couldn't do it any longer. I needed to be self-sustaining. And I was. Every time, I felt stronger and more committed to doing this for me. I could not do it for her. What are you choosing to do for you? You need to believe that you are capable of more. This can be the beginning of a new life - YOUR LIFE - and you can choose what happens from here. I have chosen and am committed to doing all I can to change my life. In sharing my life with you, perhaps you will find what you are looking for in yourself to change your life. Let's start the snowball rolling in July. Let's use this force to impact the world the way that we are really meant to and let our hearts guide us. WE CAN!!!

Do it for me

We all do things for other people because of responsibility or obligation. This morning as I was out for my (wonderful) morning run, I was reminded of something I said to my husband just over a year ago when I got up to run for the first time without Rocky. I told him, "I cannot do it for her. I have to do it for me." I have been blessed with some new adventures that are coming my way and regardless of what comes of it, I will be able to say, "I did it for me." There are some circumstances where we must do something or be somewhere because it is the right thing to do or because we told someone we would. But we cannot live our lives like that all of the time. When we say "Yes" to everyone else except ourselves then we are setting ourselves up for resentment and bitterness. We have to remember to do things for ourselves also, but not in a selfish manner. People come to me to find out how I lost the weight, what diet am I on, etc. Even though they have seen my success and may feel inspired to make changes in their lives, I did not do it for that reason. I did it for me. I did not do it for my husband, family, or friends. I did it for me. I share my life with you because that is what I do, but I do it for me. I write in a journal just about every day for me. I am following my heart and listening to it for the first time ever and whatever happens, happens. I am pursuing other ways of sharing my perspective on life and what changes we all can make in it, even though we all have "baggage" and a past that goes along with it. I am doing it for me. Search your soul...dig real deep if you need to...and find one thing that you can do for you. I never thought that by changing my life I could change others as well. But it started with me "doing it for me."