I need to apologize

Someone mentioned to me the other day that it has been some time since I last wrote. It has not been because I have stopped this process. In fact, I have reached a new level which I will share with you in a moment. I have never stopped thinking about what responsibility I have now if people know about what I am doing. I am not just accountable to myself but I am to them as well. I have started to get up early (4:45am) twice a week to work out with a friend. We enjoy each other's company and it is a great way to see the sun come up. I want you to know that I have been very busy reading on how I can be better and what changes I need to make in myself. With all of the questions I have had, I was searching for what to do next. So of course, the book titled, "I could do anything if I knew what it was" has been extremley helpful. It forced me to look at why I am the way I am, using my childhood as reasons for my disposition. Then, something amazing happened to me yesterday. I wrote the Mission Statement for my life. It has it's own page on this same blog. I could not get the words on the paper fast enough and as quickly as they came, I spent no time really even questioning the words and their meaning. It was like they were just there. My day was "FANTABULOUS". I know that it is a made up word, but when I said it, people looked at me different. Even those that did not know I wrote a Mission Statement. I was so excited, I called two friends and read it to them over the phone and then I emailed it to them. It is emotional and raw but it is there. Take a look and let me know what you think.

Attitude is everything

I am more calm than I was a few days ago when I first was asked to speak. I am more excited about it then afraid of it. I have done some research over the weekend and have convinced myself that I need to do this, even if it is this one time. I have ordered a few books to read and have several at home already, including almost all of the "Chicken Soup for the Soul" books. I heard a speech over the weekend that really has made an impact on my life now and what I will say in this presentation. Dr. Kevin Elko's "Nerves of Steel" mentions that people are always quick to tell people what end result they want (ie, I want to lose 20 pounds; I want a new career, etc), but never tell you what they are willing to do to get there. That's the difference that has changed my attitude. What changes do you want in your life and what are you willing to do to get there? Makes you think, don't it? Have a wonderful day!

WOW!!!

The last 24 hours have been almost a whirlwind. I went to lunch with a new friend who is there as I take this journey. It was a lunch we had planned for a week or so and really are enjoying getting to know each other. She asked me one question that has sent me reeling since. Up til this point I have been good at motivating others to make changes in their lives, but did not expect her question to change mine. She simply asked me if I would come to her office and speak about attitude to her co-workers. This may sound silly, but I still am not sure what I am learning from this process so how can I share it with others? The prospect of speaking to this group is not what I am afraid of. I am terrified of what comes after. I keep asking myself, "What can I bring to the table that is not already there?" When we are invited for a dinner party or potluck, we check with the hostess to see what everyone else is bringing, which helps us make our decision on what to bring. Every morning, I receive a daily Bible verse and this morning's was Acts 20:24 - "But my life is worth nothing unless I use it for doing the work assigned me by the Lord." I don't believe in coincidence. Things happen for a reason. Most of the time, I read the Bible verse, delete it, say a little prayer, and start my day. This one is still on my phone.
The little voice has told me over and over today that I cannot be encouraging others to be courageous if I am not willing to do the same. One of the books that changed my life is called, "Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway." Right now, I feel like I am standing at the edge of the pool, wanting to get in. Not sure if I just jump in and get it over with or do I dip my toe in a little, getting a little more wet each time. Or do I wait for someone to push me in. The end result is the same...once I am in the pool it is ok because that is where I wanted to be. It doesn't matter how I got there.
In my job, I motivate young people about how they can CHOOSE what happens in their lives and how they are not destined to be anything because of circumstances. I teach them about giving more of yourself instead of getting more for yourself. I remind them that they need to do what is right, not what is easy, because usually doing what is right is not what is easy. Now, I am being asked to give that same kind of a talk to a group of adults. My philosophy has always been that I would rather give a speech in front of 200 people instead of accept an award in front of 10. Why? When you accept an award, the focus is on you. When you speak, the focus is what you are talking about.
In case you are wondering, I agreed to give the presentation to her group.