Never too late

I have to believe that there are some situations where it is never too late. I tell people to never give up and you only believe to never give up if you also believe first that it is not too late. There is one situation that I am dealing with now that I tell myself every day that it's never too late. I have to believe that and will always believe that until I am told otherwise. When I am told that I can never fix it, that I can never be forgiven, that it can never go back to the way it was before. Those words may never be said, but every day I live as if the wrong I did never happened, but still try to make it up inside my heart. That is the hardest part of all. Is it ever too late? I believe it is only too late when we start living with regrets or have passed on from this world. I have not been very good about exercising this holiday weekend and at this time of year, people make resolutions that usually include eating better, exercising more, giving more, etc. You know...the list goes on with slightly different words, but the intent is the same. You know it and I know it. Then, what happens if we miss a day here or there...we give up and say it's too late. Why do we give up so easily? Because you miss one day, that doesn't mean you throw the other 364 days out too! It just means you missed one day. That's it. One day. It's still not too late. I never thought I would have the body I do now, and even Rocky didn't think I would become what I have because of that one day at lunch in April of 2010. I know I surprised myself as much as I surprised her. This year, I will again focus again on staying fit in a couple of different ways and look forward to the challenges that I expect to encounter along the way. I want to define myself in ways that will bring joy to this world and am not willing to concede that it's too late. For any of us. Don't ever believe that either.

Almost doesn't count

How many times have we said, "We almost had it" or something like it. Guess what? Almost doesn't count. Yes, you tried. No, you were not successful. Try again. And again. What are you trying to achieve? What are willing to do to get there? Have you done the same thing over and over with the same results? Then do something different! "I almost hit a home run." "I almost got an A on my paper." "I almost cahnged the lives of many." I have said it before...don't ever give up. You can change anything you want to change and therefore, the world as we know it can be changed. Almost is not an option and never should be a reason as to why you cannot do more. What have you "almost" done lately? Don't you want to say you "did it?" Finish a project that you have been working on for months. I need to get back into my scrapbooking so that all of the pictures I have printed (and have yet to be printed) have their place. That is my goal this winter...to spend more time to scrapbooking. When my next son graduates from high school in 2 1/2 years, I want to have his scrapbook ready for his party. I need to get started now. Tackle your "almosts" and move them out of that column. Make them a part of the "done" pile so then you can say, "Almost doesn't coount."

Never know how far

Do you know? No, no one really knows how far they can go until they get there. And even then, that doesn't mean that that is the farthest you can go, does it? I don't think it does. I think we can always do more, even if we never make it to more. We have to try and keep trying. I remember feeling so frustrated when I had tried to lose weight before that watching my husband drop pounds every day made we want to give up. I was a different person then. I used to put limits on what I could do because I never thought or believed that I could do more. When the road came to an end, then I was done. But now, if I came to a road that came to an end, I would just go off-roading. It might be a little bumpy and put some wear and tear on me but I wouldn't be stuck. There are so many people out there that have other difficulties that I could never imagine and just flourish. I was totally inspired by Kyle Maynard's story and that is what drove me to run on the days that Rocky wasn't there. He still inspires me. What inspires you? I sometimes think I have to day planned out on what will happen, as it routinely does, and then something exciting happens. Yesterday, I had two young people stop by my office and show me their brand new two week old son. After they left, I realized that, again, they didn't have to stop by they CHOSE to stop by because of something I said to them or the kindness I showed them. You just never know. But you have to start something new and keep going. Never give up. Always give your all. Be there. You just never now how far you can take your life.

Keep working it...

Gosh, it is so hard sometimes not to want to give up. To throw in the towel and just walk away. And be done. Forever. It doesn't matter what it is and sometimes we are faced with if come to that conclusion and there is no other way, WHEN do you decide to do it? When is the RIGHT time? Is there such a thing? What happens if you are wrong? I have said before to NEVER give up...not ever...even if it makes you raw and hurt. But what if you want something different now than you did before? Is it wrong to want that something different? Will others around you understand and support you because they love you? Even if it dramatically changes things? I will keep working it until I get told not to or the sign is so HUGE that I cannot miss it. I am not ready to give up. Is there something in your life that you want to be different, but not sure how? It doesn't have to be a big thing...start with something little and see where that takes you. I am in awe when spring comes (I say this as I look out and see snow everywhere) and the little seeds start to break free of the blanket of dirt that surrounded them and they grow. Every year, certain plants routinely return to BLOOM and show the world that they are still here after months of lying dormant, forgotten, and left unattended. Maybe that is a little how I feel...a little dormant, forgotten, and receiving little attention. But I will keep working it so when the time is right, I too can show the world that I am still here.

Rudy

When our middle son was younger, his nickname was Rudy, after the character from the movie with the same name. Sean Astin stars as a young kid whose dream is to go to Notre Dame as that his family's team. However, he is a short kid and really does not fit for the "Fighting Irish's" tradition for football players. After getting through one obstacle after another and wanting to quit because he was promised to get the chance to suit up (not play) on the last game of the season and the new coach decides not uphold the previous coach's promise to Rudy. My favorite part is when the entire team decides to turn in their jersey so that Rudy can suit up. Every single member of that team was willing to give up their spot for that onegame so this kid who had devoted everything to this team could have one chance to just stand on the sidelines. One. How much committment does it take to give your all, getting beat up and thrown around, and knowing full well that you will never see the field? More than most of us would care to admit. Even on our best days. Do you know a Rudy? Perserverance, dedication and committment are such strong qualities that we sometimes do not realize how big they are until we see them all grouped together. Until adversity comes our way and we truly find out where our courage and strength come from. It comes from places we cannot find because we are looking for it. It is something we are born with, even when we don't know it. Rudy gets more than he bargained for when with the persuading crowd chanting his name, the coach puts him in the game for the last two plays of the game. Probably even more amazing is that this is a true story. Be your own Rudy - show people what you are made of and are willing to do to see your dreams come true. They will happen not without struggle and downfall, but only after those things come to the surface. Don't ever give up - be a Rudy!!!!

Sometimes, life is just hard

It is difficult to know what to do next...actually, that is not true. It is easy to know what to do next when I allow my heart to lead, but reality sets in and makes me take stock of what else I must consider. Other issues outside of this makes it hard to fix as well. I have asked people I trust what I can do to rectify that situation and they are at a loss just as much as I am. How can I explain what I feel deep down and what I believe my destiny is to someone that is not necessarily speaking the same language I am? I know that what I am taking on will take more of my already time-consumed day, where I have to balance everything I have in it. How? One breath at a time is the only answer I can come up with right now. I know this is just temporary and I will get through it. Not sure how or when, but I will. We are presented with small reminders of what makes us realize that we cannot get where we want to go, without some small hurdles and detours. I was planning on spending some time this weekend to get some things done that need almost immediate atttention, but I did pretty much none of it. I felt deflated, like a balloon slowly losing air. However, I will not be defeated. This is a test...and it will pass. I just have to keep working at it and eventually success and triumph will come my way. I know this post is not one of the familiar ones you might be used to, but this one is real-life and you all can relate to it. Some days, I don't feel like I show my "moxie" or "bloom". Need to go for a run and clear my head. Hope your day is a great one.

Adversity makes you stronger

I was talking with our youngest son this morning about something not related to this blog and I told him, "Adversity makes you stronger." He told me he did not know what that meant. That got me thinking...I know, watch out. Adversity is never anything we wish for because that means that there are struggles and no one likes to struggle. No one wishes that their loved ones struggle. Yet, it is there for all of us. Sometimes, even when we don't think it will be. I spent the next few minutes trying to explain to him that if everything came "easy", then it wouldn't mean as much nor would you feel like you had to work for it. In our family, we have raised our sons not to quit because something got difficult - we have taught them to work harder to get through it because it is difficult. My oldest son had a baseball shirt that read, "We never said it would be easy. We said it would be worth it." I see so many parents in my job that want to make their kids' mistakes "go away" because that is easy. We also believe in sending the message so expectations are never hidden. When we are down, on our knees, feeling like we do not have the strength to stand, that is when it all comes from within. The strength to stand and fight for what we want - to do all we can to make it better than it was before. We cannot win all of the time at everything - no one can. But we can always reach for success and keep trying. Wayne Gretzky said, "100% of the shots you never take ever go in." You are going to fail so expect that to happen. But you will learn something each time you do. You will learn what kind of person you are and what you want and what you are willing to do to get what you want. Adversity comes in many different forms - in comes in people, situations, and things that we will never be able to change. Be strong today. You will be grateful that you did. Imagine what you can do with the strength you now have!!

Everyone has struggles

I have missed a very dear friend, who was hurting, but I did not know it. She has been feeling like she has spiraled out of control and is so far down, she does not know how to get back to where she was before. I know most of it may be work related but work is not who we are - it should not define us. Last night, after not hearing from her for some time, she reached out to me. I would have loved to hear her voice, or better yet, to see her, but it came via the web. It still came. It was unlike her not to communicate with me for so long, and she knew I was having my own struggles and wanted to be there for me. Instead, she has closed herself off from the world. We all hit rock bottom in our life - when the well surrounding us seems to make us feel more contained and afraid; when we don't remember how we got there to even see if we can go back; when we cannot see any light to guide us in another direction; when we are in great despair. It is only then when we have to reach for others to help us because we will not be able to do it alone. We have to trust that those that we know will be there, are truly there. Her self-contained prison has made me very sad for her because I am there to help, but she has to want my help. I have left the decision up to her and will wait to hear from her, which I hope is soon. Are there people in your life that are having their own struggles? Maybe even those you don't know about? Have you reached out to them? Please don't think that because they don't tell you what is going on that they don't want to; maybe they just don't know how. I told her more than once (ok, maybe 4 times), "Don't give up." Don't quit on me, on anything she holds near to her heart, on life. The ironic thing is that one of the last things she said to me (in a different context) was, "Don't quit." I want to give her a hug and tell her that it will be ok. We keep working on asking the questions and wait for the answers. The answers will never come if we are not willing to ask the questions. It is not something that we have to decide today, tomorrow, or even this week. Keep reaching out to those you love and tell them exactly how you feel, even if it means asking for forgiveness or telling them what they mean to you. Some time ago, I had decided to let Rocky not just see the good, but the bad and the ugly too because that is real life. She especially wanted to see the bad and ugly, not because she wished that for me, but that I would share that with her. Let your friends and family help when the bad and ugly show up at your doorstep. Eventually it comes to all of us, and as long as we have people that will help us out of that well we will always be bonded together because of sharing that moment. One of my favorite sayings is, "Not my problem." Make your loved ones' struggles your problem and do not let them push you to the curb. Be there for them. You will not regret it and neither will they.

"That's how winning is done"

Weather here over the last few days has been downright miserable, but no sense in worrying about it or complaining - it doesn't change anything. Things have gotten better since I had to pick myself back up this week. Some times it is harder than others to do that, but we know we have to in order to move forward. The quote above is from a "Rocky" movie - yes, another Rocky comment. We can blame my Rocky. In part of the theme song, Rocky comes on to say, "It is not how hard you get hit, but how how you can get hit and keep moving forward. That's how winning is done." I am not one to just give up and quit. Even when I was younger, my dad tried to use reverse psychology and say, "Quit feeling sorry for yourself. Just quit then." I never wanted to quit at anything because then I would feel that whatever I had failed at had won. I don't handle that too well. I want to feel successful at just about everything I try and do. Regardless of how much time I practice it, I expect to play golf like the pros, even though it might have been a year (or longer) since I picked up a club. I am very competitive, but not against others. Against myself. Although, my expectations are lowered since having kids and I have noticed that they are (at times) just as competitive as I was when I was their age. How many of us are better at preaching about what we should do, but sometimes forget to practice it? My hand went up, did yours? Winning isn't always about there being a winner and thus, a loser. It is about being better than you were, so when we get knocked down, we have to get back up and keep trying. Over the weekend, my husband and I were flipping through the channels and found the X-Games for the para skiers. These guys have no movement in their legs and some have no legs at all. I think I overheard one announcer say this one skier lost his legs due to an IED over in Afghanistan or Iraq. Was he sitting at home, eating Cheetos and being lazy? No, this guy is out there competing with other men who sit on a specially formulated seat with one ski in a race. Now, I cannot ski to save my life - I don't like the feeling of being out of control, so I am really the Queen of the snow plow. I was truly humbled in watching these men and think of them as I type this post. They have been hit hard by circumstances that literally changed their lives and knocked them back, but they keep moving forward. Those are the kinds of attitudes and humbling sights that will ALWAYS motivate me to give my best. Even if I don't win. There is an old saying that comes to mind, "A winner never quits and a quitter never wins." Be winners today and even when you think you have less to give or don't measure up, there is always someone out there that has less than you do and is making more use of that than you are. Stay warm and safe.

Is It Ever Enough?

My striving to be better than I was before will be (and has been) a never ending struggle for me most of my life. As much as perfection is just out of reach, it is certainly something I still attempt. I constantly challenge myself to find ways to have done something different, usually better, than what it really turned out. By doing this, I never stop to think about what I did accomplish and be proud of that feat. I shy away from people saying they are proud of me, and think to myself, it wasn't good enough for my standards. When will it ever be enough? Still something I need to work on. Keep trying...we will get there together.