Thursday, November 17, 2011

Did it!

Last night was my first big public speaking engagement in front of about 300 people or so. All day, I went around getting "knuckle touches" from everyone I saw to carry the excitement and momentum going into last night. Ok, ok,...it was really about not getting nervous. Funny thing is that I wasn't nervous. Even when I got there and sat on the stage for about 20 minutes prior to the start of the program. Even when I knew people in the audience. Even when I heard my bio read and saw my name listed in the program. Then, I started reading my speech. My voice never cracked, but I could tell that my left hand was shaking when I spoke those first words. Since I was standing behind a podium, I am not sure the audience even saw it. Then, something happened. As I continued to read and look into the audience every so often, it stopped. My hand stopped shaking and I began to feel so at ease that I knew that I was born to do this. Please understand that I am NOT a spotlight seeker. People that know me know that I shy to turn the attention away from me. In fact, when I introduced Rocky to L one night, one of them commented about me being special (or something like that), and Rocky was agreeing with L and I quickly turned their attention back to the task at hand. I can talk all day long about those things that I am most passionate about and last night was no exception. I was told later by a couple of friends that I did a great job and also received some nice comments from others that attended. But last night was not about me being on stage or about any compliments that came my way. Last night was the start of something bigger. Last night was the first of many speeches yet to come. I told someone once that any potential invites that come after last night is what terrified me the most. Because that would mean change, but today I feel different about that. Today, I feel that whatever comes as a result of last night will be just fine. If nothing happens, then I am very grateful and glad I had the opportunity to speak last night. No regrets. If anything, I hope the words I spoke last night triggered something in anyone to look at their life and move forward in better and bigger ways than ever before. If that happens to one person, then it would have been worth it. If it doesn't, then it was worth it to me and I can say, "I did it!"

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